Sarah Millican announces date at Liverpool Philharmonic Hall. In, er, 2014. Really?

So here’s the info out the way: ruder-than-you’d-think and more-popular-than-you’d-think stand up comedian Sarah Millican has announced a tour, ‘Home Bird’. Dates right across the country. Regional theatres. The usual.

Here’s the more interesting bit. Dates are starting in October, 2013. More than a full year away. But Millican’s tour doesn’t roll into Liverpool until March 2014. What? The Manchester date is even worse, dragging its way to the Apollo in May 2014. May. Let’s put things into perspective: it’s only just half way through 2012.

It’s been a growing trend in comedy recently for comedians to book shows way in advance: Peter Kay and Michael Macintyre’s recent megabucks arena tours went on sale a full year in advance, amid groans from fans who resent paying £60 for something they won’t even get to see for another 12 or 13 months.

From a financial perspective, it makes total sense. Once that ticket cash is in the bank (averaging about 1000 capacity a gig, at £25 a ticket, that’s £2.5million), the tour promoters can make some seriously juicy interest on it all, and it’s more than likely all Millican’s 100 dates will sell out. But who the hell knows, or wants to plan, what they’re doing with their lives two years in advance? It’s greedy, ridiculous, and borderline depressing.

Anyway, if you fancy seeing the lady herself, put a date in that shiny 2014 diary (that you won’t even be buying for another bloody year): March 15th.

Sarah Millican
Liverpool Philharmonic Hall, Hope St
15th March 2014